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Harry and the Left-handed
League
Magician turned sit-come
star Harry Anderson
returns to Austin's
Palmer Auditorium
by
Turk Pipkin
(Originally appeared
in the Austin Chronicle)
Twenty-five years ago, when Austin
was one of the best places on earth to experience a cosmic collision of
fates, I drove my '59 International Harvester bread truck/hippie-mobile
down to Armadillo World Headquarters and told the folks in charge I should
be their opening act that very night. But wouldn't you know it, they already
had an opener, some street magician named Harry Anderson with whom I soon
stuck up a conversation, a joint, and a lifelong friendship (well, at
least so far).
In some ways, it was inevitable.
We were two of only a few successful street performers in the country;
our acts complimented rather than conflicted I was a lousy magician
and Harry couldn't juggle to save his life which meant we didn't
have to compete with each other.
A few months after that first encounter,
Harry asked me one night, "You want to be partners?"
I didn't know exactly what he meant
by that, but I knew a good deal when I heard one. So for twenty-five years
we've been partners, and I'm still not sure what it means.
For the first few years, despite the
fact that both of us spent most of the year on the road, we always ran
into each other in Austin, though wed uncannily bump into each other
almost anywhere in our respective driving and performing pilgrimages from
New Orleans to the Northwest.
A magician since his early childhood
with a mother Harry readily admitted was known to turn a trick or two
to pay for her drinking, Harry hit the streets early himself, fleecing
San Francisco tourists with the three shell game with a, Lookee,
lookee, lookee, Its the one in the middle... which one is it now.".
Game enough to pull off this classic scam, Harry still wasnt wise
enough to realize that no one with any brains runs a shell game or three
card monte without an accompanying gang of look-outs, shills paid to juice
up the action and some muscle to chill out any serious beefs.
Going solo, of course, eventually
ended the only way it could, with a guy so pissed off that hed lost
a couple of twenties and looked like a fool to boot, that he sucker-punched
Harry, breaking his jaw which remained wired shut for months afterward.
An extended liquid diet consisting mostly of Southern Comfort led Harry
to the conclusion that accepting donations might be healthier than simply
taking them.
By the time we met, Id survived
my own travails, including a three year encounter with an unlucky draft
number and the U.S. Navy by going AWOL whenever an unmissable opportunity
arose to pass the hat. If the Grateful Dead (or nearly anyone great) was
in town, I'd beg or buy my way off ship for a chance to work the lines
waiting to get into the concert. One night in L.A., after talking my way
into an opening spot at an Emmylou Harris-Leon Redbone concert, Emmylou
suggested that I come down to Dodger Stadium the next two days and juggle
somewhere between her set, the Eagles and Elton John - the first ever
rock concerts at the stadium.
With no more credentials than her
tip, I made my way past a dozen security checkpoints, got myself introduced
to 70,000 fans and finished my torch juggling act before getting the boot,
all of it without too much concern over the fact that a long-unresolved
dispute over my Conscientious Objector claim had left me permanently AWOL
and prominent in the files of every law enforcement agency in the country.
Evicted from the stage, I waded into the 70,000 plus crowd and performed
first on the pitchers mound, then on both team dugouts and on the
warning track at all three corners of the field. The crowd was so jam-packed
that it took longer to pass the hat each time than it did to actually
do the show. At some point I met one of those beautiful prototypical California
beach chicks who offered to help me pass the hat, which, since I was performing
a piece of clowning about a guy rolling and smoking a fifteen foot doobie,
always came back almost as filled with drugs as it was money.
Parked at the beach that Sunday evening
with my very temporary new surfer girlfriend, we counted out a thousand
bucks in small bills and change, a couple of hundred multi-colored joints
and enough questionable acid and mysterious pharmaceuticals to light up
Santa Monica.
The only thing all that has to do
with Harry is that I used the dough to hire a lawyer who got convinced
the Navy I'd been right along so that I soon found myself in Austin where
Harry and I met and soon became partners, probably because it was destiny,
but possibly because I still had a lot of mystery joints hidden beneath
the floor of my van.
For a time, the money we made was
mostly dropped in our hats, but it doesnt take long to get tired
of that routine and start looking for some real clubs or theaters or college
union shows that would actually tell you how much you were going to make
BEFORE the show.
Soon Harry took residence in the old
Alamo Hotel, living for months next door to LBJ's neer-do-well brother,
Sam Houston Johnson, who frequently greeted us in his smoking jacket as
he let Zip the elevator man bring a bottle to his room.
Having sold my step van to pay for
an extended trip to Europe, where the street gigs were lucrative but the
European girls less susceptible to my bullshit, I was living in west campus
with the Art & Sausages gonzo political gang and could be found nearly
every midnight eating pie and drinking coffee with Harry at the old Steak
& Eggs on 19th St. (before the name was changed to MLK) where we talked
about comedy and magic, movies and theater.
Harry had taken a happy hour gig doing
close-up magic at Mike and Charlies Bar so his hands and mind were
constantly working, stacking cards and loading dice, and generally dreaming
up new ways to put on the shuck on the same overflow crowd of regulars
who came by every night to see what he'd dreamed up.
At some point, Harry decided hed
created or learned 24 hours of card magic so Michelle Jarouschy (bless
his soul) booked him into the Gaslight Theater (later the Capital City
Playhouse, now Fadó) where Harry did just that, 24 hours of card magic
without repeating a trick. I spent the whole 24 hours gathering the huge
piles of spent decks and sorting into blues and red, bicycles and ??,
marking or stacking them for whatever tricks I thought might be next.
Harry made a quick trip to New Orleans
for Mardi Gras where he spent three days in the drunk tank for passing
the hat, an experience he must not have minded much since he soon moved
back to New Orleans where I temporarily lost track of him. No problem,
I drove down, walked into the first bar that caught my eye - the Alpenhof
just off Jackson Square and found Harry drinking a Dixie beer and
demonstrating the shell game.
In the meantime, Id become the
semi-regular opening act at the Armadillo, working with Spyro Gya, Talking
Heads and Commander Cody, and eventually inheriting the New Years
Eve gig after manager Bobby Hederman put Harry on at five minutes till
midnight in front of a riotous partying crowd, then later had the gall
to tell Harry that he, didnt go over too well.
Months would pass without our seeing
each other I'd be in Italy or Harry in Ashland at the Oregon Shakespeare
Festival then we'd hook back up and trade notes on what we'd learned.
When you're inventing a path that no one's been down before, it is very
little about money and almost completely about what you can learn. The
trick was to book a gig - say a two hour one man show at Capital City
Playhouse - that forced you to create new material. I figured if Harry
could pull it off, then so could I. It wasn't until years later that I
realized he was thinking the same thing about me.
After an extended trip to Great Britain,
Harry returned to Austin with his new partner and wife, Leslie, and told
me that they were moving to Hollywood where he was going to become a television
star. I thought he was nuts and wished him luck.
Within months I was camped out on
the futon sofa of their one room apartment, ideally situated in a drug
infested neighborhood just a block off Hollywood Boulevard. Every weekday
began with the three of us gathering around Harry and Leslie's tiny television
with a 4" screen watching David Letterman's short-lived but brilliant
morning show. Harry quickly introduced me to his clubhouse, the nearby
Magic Castle where some of the greatest magical minds of our century were
happy to spend their waning years passing on the secrets of their trade.
Soon I was living in L.A. myself,
performing at comedy clubs, learning what I could and chipping in my two
cents worth as Harry created a smart-ass stage persona named Harry the
Hat who took no prisoners and became infamous for acts like shoving needles
through his arm, swearing all the while that it was an illusion
"Like economic recovery," he'd ad but, oh what an illusion when
that bright red blood came trickling down his arm!
One day we drove out to Azusa, California
to do a little shopping at an old-fashioned illusion factory called Owen
Magic and the owner Les Smith showed us a vintage gambler's hold-out
an piece of intricate brass machining with which a card player could surreptitiously
hook a hidden wire from one knee to the other and mechanically switch
an ace from his sleeve to his hand.
"They took that one off a body that
washed up years ago on Santa Monica beach," Les told us. Harry didn't
know why but he had to have it. Driving back to home, we hustled to think
of how he'd explain to his wife that he'd just spent their entire savings
of $800 on a useless gambling prop. By the time we reached Hollywood,
Harry had written an entire new act in which the hold-out was the absurdly
impossible explanation for how he'd performed a torn and restored bill
trick, taking off his jacket and pants to show how'd he'd hooked his knee
together and done the trick. The point, of course, was that his pants
were down and his boxer shorts ridiculous. Audiences loved it, and the
next time I turned on a tv, Harry was in Vegas, on Saturday Night Live
and just about anywhere else you turned the dial (because there weren't
yet all that many choices).
As one might expect, as Harry's 'partner'
I didn't share in all his success, but the truth is, I didn't do too bad.
When Harry the Hat was made a semi-regular cast member in a new NBC sit-com
called "Cheers," he managed to sneak me in the door as the warm-up act
for the tapings. We co-wrote a Harry the Hat book that sold better than
any of the six I've since published, and magic specials for Showtime,
CBS and NBC
The day following Harry's debut on
Cheers, the sitcom pilot scripts came pouring in, and I took it upon myself
to wade through all the shit (and most were shit) in search of something
worthwhile. One day I pulled a script called "NightCourt" out of the trash,
read about twenty pages and told Harry, "I think you better take a look
at this."
Harry took a hard look, got the part
and was soon living in a Michael Landon's former manse, which Harry renamed
"Casa Residuales."
Sometimes we took our partnership
a little too seriously. When Christy and I got married in Austin, Harry
was our best man. Then two days later, Harry and I embarked on a nationwide
club and concert tour, including a Honeymoon stop at Niagara Falls where
we had our picture taken together on the Maid of the Mist. While we were
touring, I was his opening act, road manager and called the lights and
sound for his set. In our spare time, we pieced together a one-hour special
for Showtime called "Hello, Sucker." At Harry's insistence, I was a co-starring
second banana, and though the show turned out great, it was obvious I
wasn't going to repeat Harry's successes on TV.
No matter, I'd assimilated enough
television knowledge from being around my partner to start getting network
writing gigs, a long string which thankfully continues to this day. Through
it all, one of our most gloriously ridiculous endeavors was a company
of wiseguys which Harry assembled and called The Left Handed League.
For a couple of years in the early
80s we were Harry the Hat's gang, consisting of mentalist Leslie Anderson,
ventriloquist and star of the sitcom Soap Jay Johnson, magician and aspiring
publisher Mike Caveney, second generation British magician Martin Lewis,
and an exceedingly beautiful exotic dancer/witch/magician named Katlyn
Miller. Though everyone was indeed left-handed except for me (who was
explained as either ambidextrous or left-brained) our name was based more
on our left-handed methods of getting things done. Truthfully, no one
knew what to think of us, and that, of course, was our greatest strength.
Occasionally we all gathered to put
on a weird and wonderful Halloween or New Year's show, but our chief celebrity
rested in our claim to have never failed to solve any problem,
or create any deception required.
(Certainly our problem-solving skills
were unique. Martin Lewis's self-described motto in the league was "The
British Cheat." But when his business cards came back from the printer
reading "The British Chest," Martin solved the problem by declaring the
typo an improvement.)
"Mental and Physical Phenomena, Psychic
and Mystic manifestations, Locks and Pockets Picked," read a pitch sheet
I wrote to describe our collective talents. "Sophists and Pharisees undone.
The Boundaries of Reality Godlessly Gerrymandered." The phrases just kept
coming, I couldn't stop.
The amazing thing was that Hollywood
actually fell this incredible load of bull. HBO optioned a movie based
on a play written by Harry; Bud Shrake and Dan Jenkins sold us to a studio
to create a third act sting for a con movie they were writing.
"We told them the truth and they fell
for it," became one of Harry's favorite sayings.
The pinnacle of our gall, if I can
be so bold, probably occurred in 1982 when the League decided that the
world of magic was ripe for parody, especially those often fatuous magic
magazines, only a couple of paragraphs of which would put anyone but a
stone cold magic geek into a life-long coma. Since the most widely read
of these was Genie Magazine, it was only a small leap of logic to write
and publish "Wenii" a nicely executed lampoon of Genie in which a large
amount of the humor was derived from dick jokes. In Wenii the father of
modern magic was not Harry Houdini, but Harry Hujuini, the illustrations
of the tricks featured hands with six fingers, and the reviewed magic
tricks were rated with magician's wands ranging from stiff to limp. If
it sounds Sophmoric, it was meant to be (or so we claimed). If we had
properly skewered the dicks of the magic world (as nearly everyone seemed
to believe), the we figured the world of magic was better off for it.
To this day, my favorite all-time
piece of comedy writing is Mike Caveney's fictitious (but all to real)
review of the Southern California Unified Magican's (S.C.U.M.) Conference
in Monrovia, California. The hit of the show, according to Mike, was a
mentalist named Eddie Nomber who covered his eyes with two metal washers,
scotch tape, glazed donuts, 45 rpm records and wrapped his whole head
in Saran Wrap.
"Am I holding a pair of glasses,"
asked his assistant who was wandering through the audience testing his
skills.
"Yes," replied Mr. Nomber.
Item after item was held aloft
and Eddie never failed with the correct response. Even when she tried
to stump him: "A lawnmower?" "No." "A cattle prod?" "No." "A comb?" Yes."
Finally she asked, "Am I holding
up a S.C.U.M. bag?" and Eddie responded, "You are surrounded by S.C.U.M.
bags!" The audience roared its approval.
I tell you this and all the rest as
one of the longest invitations cum recommendations on record. Labor Day
weekend, Harry Anderson and The Left-Handed League will be performing
our 20th Anniversary reunion show at Palmer Auditorium as part of the
statewide convention of the Texas Association of Magicians.
No word yet on whether any S.CU.M.
bags will be in attendance, and I don't know whether Harry will be dropping
trou, "eating the pig," or shoving a needle through his arm for your entertainment,
but I do know that it's Harry's first show in Austin in over a decade
(and his first visit since we both had vasectomies by local urologist
Dick Chop, which I wrote about for Playboy and which I can assure you
was taking the partnership thing a bit too far).
Palmer Auditorium is hardly the same
as the Armadillo where Harry and I met, but I'm taking comfort in the
fact that it's right across the street from the spot where my life took
a left-handed turn for the better. Hey, what more can you ask?
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